Kicking It with my stuff

Elizabeth Youngman-Westphal

Special to The Village News

George Carlin said it best in his bit about “Stuff.” Paraphrasing him, we’d all agree that my stuff is good, while your stuff isn’t.

Which is why I wondered when driving past a neighbor’s house, if they were having a party? I mean, the drive was lined with newish cars while the open- garage door revealed it to be overflowing with a lot of stuff.

I cannot help but wonder why anyone can justify parking a $40,000, $50,000, $60,000 vehicle in the elements while a $50 faux-leather sofa is taking up the garage space?

Clearly, this residence is occupied by first-married couples. As it happens, those of us in second marriages have more clearly defined household-storage rules. For instance, every residential space in our household is divided to accommodate our individual stuff.

I will admit, there is no doubt about it, my husband is the neatest one. Or said another way – obsessively compulsive. While always considering myself a tidy person, by comparison, I rat-hole my stuff.

For instance, I am likely to jam a pillow case onto the linen shelf, where on his half of the hall cupboard, he neatly folds and stacks the bath towels.

However, I must say in my own defense, if company is staying overnight, I will straighten every item on every shelf throughout the house, including organizing my sock drawer. Why? Because I am shallow and I want my guests to assume it is I who is the neat one.

Really, I don’t know why I bother because once we are friends, it doesn’t matter. The reason is by the time we are friends, they find me so charming, that my undisciplined behavior is of no consequence.

Now this sounds weird, but I cook a lot in the garage. Well, not everything. I microwave popcorn out there and use my new air fryer out there. After all, who wants to cram one’s kitchen counter full of appliances or turn on the oven in summer?

As for the air fryer, it makes the best French fries. It also bakes mini quiche perfectly. I especially enjoy baked potatoes because the skin gets crispy.

Lately, I have even started using the air fryer to dehydrate persimmons. They turn out chewy and sweet.

We will have enjoyed a pre-Thanksgiving turkey dinner with friends when you read this. To me, the fourth Thursday in November is just that, Thursday. Although, it is a good excuse to watch the Macy’s Day Parade announcing the timely arrival of Santa!

Another thing that occurs this time of year is looking at our Medicare program for next year. By the way, you still have until the 7th of December to determine if you need to make changes.

Also, we both got our annual flu shot. Plus, I got a pneumonia booster good for the next 10 years. Inspires one to live longer just to use it up.

Finally, since it is fall, it’s time for me to put away my summer stuff in order to make closet space for my stored winter stuff. This is the semi-annual stuff switch to be reversed next spring.

George said it best, “After all, a house is just a place with a cover on it to store our stuff so we can go out and buy more stuff.” Here! Here!

Elizabeth Youngman-Westphal can be reached at [email protected].